Can’t move on

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I want to move on but can’t let go of what I have.
I’m strongly attached to my current experience. To the stuff I have. I like what I have. Moving on makes me sad because I need to give up on what I have.
What if I won’t have this experience anymore after I move on. What if I won’t get to enjoy what I enjoy now.
How do you let go of something that is good?
I know I had enough but I still can’t let go.
I fear if I move on then I’ll miss out on having what I have now.
It’s like wanting to be in two places at once.
I want to stay and go. Have this while having that.
I feel that I don’t need both. I know that I don’t want both. I know I want to move on.

How do you walk away from something good that already exhausted itself?
Something close to you. To your heart. Something you got used to. Took for granted. But now when you need to walk away suddenly you see its value.

I don’t want to walk away feeling bad. Feeling sad. Feeling that I’ll miss out if I go.

Why we don’t appreciate good things when we have them. Enjoy the life that is already here.
That’s is because we are used to noticing what we don’t have.
What we might not have, what we might lose, might miss out.
The moment something is about to leave our experience we begin to notice it.
We notice the fear of what it would be like not having what we have.
Like we notice the fear of what we don’t have.

We don’t really want to stay. We don’t really struggle with letting go.
We fear what it would be like not having something.
What feels bad is the fear. But this fear is different. It is bittersweet. Because we suddenly appreciate something. Something that we might not have soon. What feels good is the appreciation, what feels bad is the fear.

But fear is like any other experience. Experience of missing out or wanting something that is not there. Fear is here for us to notice what doesn’t feel good. What thought, what emotion, what belief.
Why fear what you don’t have or might lose when you can enjoy what you do have.

The point is that sometimes we take for granted what we do have. It’s too familiar to us, having what we have. We don’t see even the point of appreciating what we have, because it’s already there.

So we look for what isn’t there.
We say to ourselves – I already have this or that, what do I think I want now?
I know ! I want something that I don’t have or might not have and since I don’t have what I want or might lose having what I enjoy, I’ll feel shitty about it, that’s what I’ll do.

If you can’t see or touch physically something that you want, it doesn’t mean that you need to feel bad about it. All it means that you’re not focused on what you do have. You don’t appreciate what you do have.
Thinking about something that you want doesn’t mean that you will have it in this second. If you can’t have what you want in this second it means that you are not ready to have what you want.

Perhaps you believe secretly from yourself, that you do not deserve what you want. Perhaps you don’t really want it, you want it just because someone else got it. If you really desire something, you don’t care if you have it or not. Because only thinking about it will make you smile. You will immediately feel how it would be like having it. Which is essentially equal to having it. Because once you have something you want, all you do is feel the experience.

So relax your focus from what you don’t have or missing or fearing that you will miss in the future. Appreciate what you have right now. Know if you truly want something it will make you feel happy instantly. If it makes you sad, it means you’re focused on not having what you want.

What you can do then is, ask yourself – How would it feel having what I want? and feel it. If you can’t feel good and still feel bad, that means that you believe in something that is preventing from you feeling good about what you want.
If so, ask yourself – What do I believe that is preventing me from having what I want?

Know your beliefs that are preventing you from having what you think you want.
These beliefs will always focus on what is missing – Love, worthiness, money, appreciation, compassion, etc.

Know that every belief that is focused on what is missing – is a false belief.
Because what is missing does not exist.

So start appreciating what you do have and stop limiting your imagination by focusing on what you don’t have.

A good place to start appreciating is your body and your senses.
Take 2 minutes to appreciate what you can do with your body.
Seeing, hearing, walking, smelling, dancing, laughing, running, smiling, feeling, etc.

Find something to appreciate, when you notice yourself focusing on what is not there and feeling bad about it.

What is not there does not exist, that’s why it feels bad.

Yours truly,
Boris.

 

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Self realization, Self awareness, mentor, speaker, blogger.

One thought on “Can’t move on”

  1. Natasha Zamoshkin says:

    I took a moment to appreciate my body, like i really thanked it for every function and i got the chills as if it thanked me back for noticing it.
    Thank you for the reminder

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