When we suffer physically we don’t really have a choice, the pain is there and there isn’t much we can do, except take some painkillers to numb the pain which doesn’t always help. Withstanding physical pain is basically waiting for it to go away. People have a tremendous power to endure pain, caused to the body for various reasons. We survive everything that doesn’t kill us, and that is a lot.
If you’ve experienced once a great physical pain, you probably only wanted for the pain to go away, you didn’t want anything else at that moment. Looking back you at your greatest pain you can appreciate your ability to be in pain and to go through it. Pain is also one of the reasons why we fear. We fear to be in pain and therefore we prefer to ignore any situation that might cause us pain. Addictions are one of those situations. We prefer to ignore our addictions, sometimes knowingly just so we won’t have to deal with fear and pain.
Sometimes we live our lives in awareness to something that we do repeatedly that harms us and scares us and we choose to ignore it, postpone it. We think that we are incapable to deal with it. Perhaps it scares us to deal with it, perhaps we are afraid to admit something to ourselves. We choose to ignore fear by keep feeding our detrimental habits or addictions.
Remember when was the last time you were in a great deal of physical pain, a pain that you almost couldn’t bear. Remember – that pain did not kill you. It did something else, it showed you, your ability to survive. Can you compare that pain to whatever fear you have that relates to a harming habit or addiction?
Fear is real, so is the pain. But fear from non-existing pain is only paralyzing our ability to react and move forward with our lives. Can you imagine not needing to be afraid anymore, because you’ve transformed yourself, your harming habits and addictions into things that you like?
To transform yourself beyond addictions, all it takes is
- To be interested in living differently.
- To be willing to see your fears while choosing differently.
- Not to judge yourself in the prosses no matter what.
While choosing differently even if it only means thinking about it, take whatever response your mind and body give you and just be with that response, don’t fight it. Meanwhile stay true to your will to change and don’t judge yourself.
If you see that you can’t do that – don’t hurry into conclusion that you’ve failed. You simply didn’t see all the way through your fear. You didn’t allow yourself to be with whatever response you received emotionally from your mind or body.
Perhaps a thought came up, or a memory or a feeling that was too overwhelming to bear. Don’t judge yourself for it. Whatever comes up is relevant for you to see. However, it might take time to see all that there is and to go through this process.
If you think that you need to take a break, take a break. But be consistent with what you have set to do. Don’t neglect yourself by thinking that it is too hard or too painful. You already know that you can endure much greater pain than this. What scares you is not the pain but the fear of the unknown, the fear to be in the unknown, the fear to go back to old habits.
Remind yourself that fear is a preventing-from-danger mechanism. See that there is no danger in being where you are right now. See that you are safe without the harming habits and addictions. Repeat your new decision to be different whenever your addictions call you. Repeat your new decision in action or in thought all the while being patient and forgiving and compassionate towards yourself. After all, you are who you are because you believe that you can’t be free, or can you?