What is the quickest way to help myself? people ask. Everybody wants a quick solution to their problem. But wouldn’t you prefer the right solution instead of a quick one? You see we are all different. We feel, interpret circumstance, experience things in different ways, therefore we form beliefs, habits, patterns, thoughts each in his and her unique way. So when someone offers a solution for you, see if you resonate with that solution, on an emotional level by noticing your body’s response and not only your mind’s response.
There are millions of methods to help yourself, some work better than others, the problem with methods that they are generalized to help many people. We all know that the best way to learn a skill or to get better at something – it is to take a private tutor that adapts his teachings and methods to you individually. An intuitive guide or a mentor can guide you and point you with more precision, where you need to look, but only if you’re communicating directly and not watching him on youtube or facebook or reading his blog on your smartphone. But let’s say that you are and it brings you relief of some sort. As a result, you begin to think that whoever you’re following they’re beneficial to your growth. But what about the times that you’re not watching that video, or reading that blog? Are you still the same? Are you still suffering?
The same goes for getting traditional or spiritual help when you’re guided one-on-one and your mind is absorbing the insights and the energies, what happens later when you go home or go to work the next day, Are you still suffering from the same things?
Don’t get me wrong getting help as a result of becoming aware of how we feel and taking action is a huge thing. However when talking about self-help, self-awareness, self-awakening notice that those terms have the word self in them. Most people when they have a problem they hire other people to fix their problems, they rely on other people to help them. This is how the world works you invest in something and then you expect to get something in return. Investing not necessary money, we invest our time, focus our awareness, energy, watching and listening to what others have to say. And for most this is where it ends.
Even when we understand the root of all our sufferings, feelings, emotions, we still give our power to other people because we are used to those moments of relief reading that blog, watching that youtube channel, going to that therapist. We rather do that instead of focussing on the self.
The minute you realize that you are not a victim of your circumstance, your body, your feelings, make a deliberate choice to hold on to your power. Because right there you know that you’re the one making the change, making things happen. You’re not depended on what others say that can make you feel better. Use all your knowledge to help yourself, by not procrastinating what hurts emotionally, physically or mentally to a later time when you have time. There is no other time than now. If you feel bad and procrastinate, you allow yourself to suffer more, you learn to suffer more. Don’t stick to any advice that was given to you or a method or a practice that you follow like it is written in stone. Following someone or something out of a habit, blindly will create a limitation to your own growth.
Always do what feels right, right now, not only what you think is right, and always have a peek at what is to come. Ask yourself constantly about whatever you’re feeling if it is beneficial to you – “Am I doing this out of habit? Ideology? Is it really helping me grow right now?”
For example, let’s take a person that was disconnected from his emotions for a long time. So he started practicing being attentive to his own emotional state and one of the practices that he did was, allowing himself to feel his “bad” emotions. So he took 15 minutes out of his lunch break every day to be with his emotions. This created a pattern in his life that limited him being with his emotions, 15 minutes a day, which is great in comparison to never being attentive to emotions at all.
Do you see where I’m going with this?
The quickest way to help yourself is not by creating a limiting pattern or a self-improving habit or taking someones advise. It is knowing that you have the power to chose whose advice you want to take, what practice you want to apply, and knowing for how long you want to do that by being attentive to your emotional, physical, mental, states at all times. If you need to isolate yourself to be with yourself then do that, do whatever it takes to get to know how it is like to nourish yourself. But then again don’t get stuck on that. Your emotional, physical, and mental state is eventually your current state of being and it is a result of who you were. Don’t get absorbed too much in who you were, always have a peek at who you want to become.
Don’t let your mind tell you what you need to do, listen to your emotions and your body also.
Don’t let emotions tell you what to do, listen to your mind and your body also.
Don’t let your body tell you what to do, listen to your emotions and your mind also.
Be aware and give attention to all of your states of being – the physical, the emotional, and the mental, without limiting yourself, because there is no need to because you have the power to choose what’s next. This is the quickest way to help yourself.