Do you find yourself wanting to prove that you are better than someone? If you notice that moment in time, you might feel that you are somehow less than who you were a moment before, unworthy, deprived, lacking something. An unsettling urge is overtaking your state of being, you now have a need to prove a point, because you don’t like feeling like this. You need to prove your worth because you actually believe that you were deprived of your worth and now you are less worthy.
How does this happen? How come there are moments that we feel absolutely fine, and there are moments that we feel that we are less. Less than someone, less than some standard.
Our society encourages competition. They say it is good for a lot of things such as economic growth, better products, therefore, a better quality of life. Nowadays it is not enough to create, build, improve, behave honestly – just because we want to help one another, just because we want to take care of one another, just because it is the right thing to do. Just because it feels good to do the right thing.
If you ask me competition is an outdated concept. It evolved from a lack of resources, fear, greed, and survival. Yes, it is a part of the world as we know it today. People living in fear, fighting for resources, fighting for survival, competing for everything to have enough resources. For most the collective mindset is – each for himself. We were brought up thinking like that. Like it or not we are like that. Every time that some other guy gets that promotion that you think should’ve been yours. Every time you come into a new workplace, you’re expected to prove yourself, your worth. Every time you compare yourself to another because you believe that you need to be like them. You compete.
We need what others have because we fear to be less than others. We judge ourselves based on others. We judge others like us because we don’t like ourselves. We want to fit in. We are scared that if we won’t, we will be judged by others. I need to prove to everyone that reminds me of how unworthy and lacking I am that I’m not like that. I am worthy. I am better.
But how can we prove something like that, if we don’t believe that we are worthy in the first place? We can’t. That’s why we compete endlessly. Being led by emotions that remind us of our beliefs of how unworthy we are, and we follow those beliefs blindly. As long as we keep believing “that’s how things are”, there will always be some circumstance that will demand from us to prove our worth to ourselves or others, whether in a family situation, our workplace, on a vocation, to a stranger on the street. As long as we keep believing in our old views of the world as we were taught by society, we will keep running after that unreachable destination of proving our own worth.
Look at your life right now, look at what makes you worried, what makes you fear. Look at the things you do to make yourself less worried. The things that you do to make yourself less worried, notice how they feel. If they feel bad – Ask yourself – How would it feel if you didn’t need to do anything to be calm, peaceful, pleased or happy.