Who is in control? Is it the mind? Ask yourself who is in control when you’re upset, frustrated, depressed, suffering, when you’re going mad.
Ask yourself who’s controlling this? Who is controlling this state? Who is controlling my experience? Where is the source of this? Where is the root from which this is coming from? Where is this entity? What is this entity? Inquire about your current experience. Just inquire and don’t let the mind answer your questions. The mind doesn’t know the answers to these questions.
Sometimes it seems like it does because the mind is very knowledgeable about many things. No matter what your mind gives you, the answer is not the source nor the root of your experience. There is no being in that answer. The one that is in control is a being. You want to know what being is controlling this. What entity, What is the source/root of your experience? Where is it? Where is it anchored? The thoughts of the mind are not anchored in any place because they come and go.
Whenever unwanted experience arises, there’s no need to fight it or to ignore it. Whatever it may be, how uncomfortable it may seem, how intolerable it may seem, it is already here and there’s no point running away from it. What you can do is inquire about its origin. About where it is coming from. What is the source of the experience? What is the source of that which I feel right now? This inquiry will reveal to you that whatever experience you’re having, how real it may seem, whatever footprints it leaves on your emotions, in your body, the source of every experience is the same.
The root is the same, let the answer come. Let the answer come experientially, not with words, sounds or images, relax into receiving the answer not from your mind, not from thoughts, not from memory. Allow your mind to relax. If you relax your mind it will not go anywhere. There is no risk or danger in relaxing your mind. You will still be safe with a relaxed mind just as you’re safe with an anxious or restless mind.
The mind is not the one that is keeping you safe. There was a time when your mind wasn’t so evolved, wasn’t so much in control over your life. You provided the environment for the mind to evolve, to take control. You are safe before the mind thinks it is safe. So relax your mind, allow your mind to relax knowing that it is okay. When you do that, ask yourself what is the source, what is the origin of my experience right now. Inquire about its whereabouts, about its root. Look for it, not physically but from a place of curiosity. Be curious about it, contemplate about it effortlessly by relaxing your mind.
Contemplate by asking a question, not by thinking about the answer.
The mind is arrogant. The mind thinks it is the source for everything. It takes responsibility for knowing everything, knowing the answer to everything. It wants to take control over everything. It wants to express its opinion. There is an opinion in your mind about every experience that you had or having right now. You don’t even need to search for it, your mind knows what it is. You have conclusions and descriptions about it.
Suffering comes from conclusions and descriptions about your current and past experiences. When you believe that you know what you’re experiencing, you cling into this knowing every time experience comes up. You cling onto a conclusion, a description of what you’re going through and you’re stuck with your attention on it. Every time a particular experience repeats itself the same conclusions and descriptions come up about it. Every time you find yourself with the same conclusions and descriptions.
This is what prevents us from letting go, from moving on, from letting the experience come and go through us.
But who is suffering? Where is the source of this feeling? Where is the source of this conclusion about this feeling? Where is the root of these words that my mind comes up with?
You’re not the inventor of these words. You’re the Storyteller. These words are learned. The conclusions are learned. The ways you conclude about yourself is something that you learned to do. You learned how to conclude, you learn to recognize your feelings, your emotions. You recognize the experiences that bring you these feeling and emotions.
Inquire about the root of everything. Realize that the root is not the mind, that the root is not physical, it has no color or shape or sound.
See that every experience, thought, emotion appears and disappears. Appears from where? Disappears into what? It leaves no trace it doesn’t alert about its appearance and coming. It doesn’t warn about its disappearance and going. Realize that there’s something beyond your conclusions about what is happening, about what you’re experiencing.
You don’t allow yourself to move on into what is next because you’re focusing on what is.
Allow your mind to relax into these question – What is the root of this experience? What is the source of this experience? Provide yourself the space that is needed to contemplate about these questions. Provide yourself the space that you require to relax into whatever comes.