It also seems that a need is stronger than a want. Whenever I feel that I need something it is usually backed up by a strong argument or a belief. I may want this or that and I may want something strong enough to go for it, but it will never compare to a desire of absolutely needing something.
Ask yourself what do I want, the answer could be anything, love, money, peace, etc. Now, compare between two feelings, the first one is wanting what you want and the second needing to worry about not having what you want. Which one is stronger?
As long as the need to worry is stronger it will always be in the way of getting what you want. If you want to find love, you might find yourself worrying about it more than actually being open to receive it, just because you believe that if you don’t worry about it, it would not come. But the very fact of worrying about anything puts you in a negative mindset and energy that abstracts you from receiving the thing that you want.
As long as your “wanting” is allowed to be and is not distracted by your need to worry about it, you give yourself a greater chance to receive what you want faster. In other words, a need to worry is just a disguised want that overpowers your original want, original desire.
Why the need to worry is stronger?
This need is usually backed up by past experiences, observations, conclusions, and beliefs. That is why it is rooted deeper than a regular want in your mind. You may find out that a belief about getting married existed in your mind long before you wanted to get married, and now when you find yourself wanting to get married it is much easier for you worry about it because the idea of not getting married scares the crap out of you, and people, as you know, are much easily attracted to fear than anything else. It is much easier for us to think about what we fear because we believe that we’re threatened.
If we feel a strong need to do something it is more likely that we will do it because it is supported by our minds belief system. And if we find out that we can’t do anything in order to have what we need, we fall into a continuous cycle of worry because it is not easy to let go of a deeply rooted belief.
Do this exercise every time when you find yourself struggling to get what you want.
Ask yourself – What need is preventing me from having what I want? Is it a need to worry? Do I worry because of a belief that I have? What is that belief?
The obstructive need will surface in a form of a repeating thought or a belief that you have about what you want. When you see what it is, the need to judge yourself may arise. Don’t fight it, be genuine. Observe how you react to your findings. If you judge yourself, be with your judgment without judging it.
The idea is to awaken to “what is in the way” of your want, not by fixing it or looking for a way how to fix it because fixing itself is a form of judging, it is a need that stands in your way of finding out “what is in the way”. It is enough to awaken to “what is in the way” and allow yourself to do it effortlessly just like you wake up in the morning to a new day.